Moving past step 4

Five Stages Of Grief (Kubler-Ross method)

1. Denial and Isolation.
   At first, we tend to deny the loss has taken place, and may withdraw from our usual social contacts. This stage may last a few moments, or longer.
2. Anger.
   The grieving person may then be furious at the person who inflicted the hurt (even if she's dead), or at the world, for letting it happen. He may be angry with himself for letting the event take place, even if, realistically, nothing could have stopped it.
3. Bargaining.
   Now the grieving person may make bargains with God, asking, "If I do this, will you take away the loss?"
4. Depression.
   The person feels numb, although anger and sadness may remain underneath.
5. Acceptance.
   This is when the anger, sadness and mourning have tapered off. The person simply accepts the reality of the loss.

Why cant I go beyond step 4?? There are times I think I am there but more and more I realize I am not. I think part of this is because I fear that acceptance means giving up. Like, am I going to to be like this forever? I cant accept that, no way.

Its not just cosmetic, dont get me wrong. The fact that they severed the nerve that controls feeling in my chin will not change, I will never get that feeling back. But it's not just that- I cant keep my mouth closed very easily. When I am out and about I struggle with it as no one wants to be walking around with their mouth gaping open looking simple minded. I have migraines from trying to keep my mouth closed all the time. I cant be out for more than a couple of hours at a time or I start to get anxious and tired from focusing on how my mouth looks.

Part of me thinks I wont be this way forever if I try hard enough. I think I can find someone who will help me fix my face again, but where? If I move beyond the depression and accept, does this mean giving up? I just dont know. I am tired of being depressed.

These are the best years of my life and they are moving away from me so quickly.