Friday, October 17, 2008

Implant surgery scheduled!

Or I should say, they are attaching the teeth to the implants I already have, on Nov 3rd- only a couple of weeks left! This is one of the final stages of my reconstructive phase and I cant wait. I am trying not to get too excited because I dont want to jinx myself. I am trying to prepare myself for the "actually, we have to do one more thing before we can do this" speech that I may get, and that is hard because I just want to be excited, we have been waiting SO long for this. It has been over 3 years now and I just want to get there already!

I do still have a couple of small cosmetic procedures left to do but this is the big one we have been waiting for. Of course I will keep you updated with pictures and the steps of the procedure for those wondering how it all works. They told me they want to try to do it without putting me under, it's supposed to be a fairly easy procedure but I do freak out easily, so just in case I am not to eat or drink anything after midnight the night before. Please keep me in your thoughts that we may finally be reaching the end of all of this.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Keloids and worries

SO I am fairly certain that where they did the vestibuloplasty on the floor of my mouth is 'keloiding' up all over the place. Remember that spot in the front where the metal was exposed? Well it looks like it is "bubbling up" (the only way I can describe it) like the soft tissue is healing all lumpy and it is starting to grow upwards instead of over the metal parts like the doctor said he thought it would. It has been more noticeable lately like much more lumped up, to the point where I was worrying that the amelo could be returning. But when I mentioned it to my doctor last time I was there he said it was just the way the tissue was healing. I remember when I got my ear cartilegde pierced and then took it out, I got a huge keloid and my doctor said some people are just more prone to keloids than others. Well I think that is what is happening here but I am still worried. I am concerned because I am not sure if my denture will fit much longer if it keep growing upwards the way it is for one. And for two, I am concered that they are going to want to operate on that area somehow before they can do the implants because of the way it is growing upwards all bumpy and huge like that. It is a lot more noticeable this past week than it was before when I was last there. I know the chances of the amelo returning are slim and its just a keloid but it never stops nagging me these days.

That lead me to think about the future, I mean I cannot rely on my doctors for reassurance for the rest of my life but the truth is every time there is one little thing I notice it puts me on edge for days at a time. I usually dont feel better about it all until I see my doctor and tell him how I am feeling and he reassures me. After these last surgeries are over how am I ever going to get on with my life and feel like I can live again without waiting to go to my next doctor appointment and talking about this damn thing and what will happen next. I refuse to let it take over my life and yet somehow I wonder how it CAN'T, and how I can go on without my doctors help and them reassuring me every week of my life? Tonight I am just feeling down about the whole thing.